The Gift Horse Email (with bad grammar)

So imagine this, I was just sitting here, checking my email,

minding my own business, when out of nowhere I was notified by Mr. John Something or Other, Barrar (which is some sort of deconstruction of the word Barraster) which is apparently another name for attorney. Well anyway, the good Barrar notified me the I was soon to be very wealthy, beyond my wildest expectations. Apparently, a Mr. G. H. Broussard, a hugely successful international business dude had just passed away, leaving me as his next of kin. Nevermind that that isn’t my name, I had never met this person much less be related to him, no matter at all. Isn’t Fortune wonderful and unpredictable? The amount of money that I would be certain to inherit is 9 million, less his fee, which would be half. Wait a minute…..why does the Barrar need to get half? Geez! Lawyers these days, the same world over. Of course, now all the good Barrar needs to complete this magnificent benefaction is a bit of personal information which includes: my full name, occupation, address, and of course, the bank. What? Why not my Social Security number? Well maybe I will just go ahead and put that up front because he is going to need that for taxes and such. By the way, how much would taxes be on 4.5 mil? Is John the Barrar going to pay taxes on his share too? Lastly the good attorney mentions that I should forward my information, but I should also keep all this quiet. Top secret…because he is still “in service” but once we do this “deal” then he can leave his “service.” Now I’ll bet one thing that he hasn’t mentioned to me is that there will be a nominal paperwork fee in order to receive the fortune, after all, lawyers surely don’t work for free. This all reaffirms the fact that there are good people out there, there are bad ones too. There are wolves among us. There is scary sickness, dramatic climate issues, and all sorts of bad things loose in the world. But there are good things too. To everyone out there: stay safe, sound, and happy traipsing about on this big, spinning world, and beware…..for sometimes when fortune finds you, it may not be all that…