It was right past the
cream of mushroom soup
when MeeMaw blasted by me
with her new hairdo
with a pink stripe in it too!
Beer in her basket, her anger
on soft simmer like beef stew
on a boiler.
She moved swiftly the
promise of a casino’s
winning hand spurring
her schedule
almost knocked me out cold
on the way to
Velveeta ™ and cream cheese
blasting past the fake news
shopping cart turning
on two wheels…
“Oh Hon!” like honey pie
I heard her exclaim
then went and grabbed up a
coconut cream
toasted, too
the memory of Dreamsicles™
on her lips.
Brisket brunch or
chicken spaghetti?
What to do… to do…for
the Republican Women’s luncheon?
I swear
she was about
to take the skin off
the back of my heels
I dashed by the maraschino
cherries
forgetting those lovely,
seasoned slightly salted spicy
can of Collard greens.
I was
slowing her down
she was
like a lapsed Baptist
on the way to a soul cleansing
or making ’em great rally,
hell hath no fury
like a miffed MeeMaw.
MeeMaw, a tad bit dumpy
much too grumpy
in a hurry here
on Aisle 3
to get home to
her two fluffy dogs
and goal casting
as Brightbigot radio
10th caller of the day.
Loved this!
Thanks Rae!
Good to have goals!
Most definitely! 😀
Somehow I see an unlit cigarette dangling from MeeMaw’s lips.
Maybe a little Natty Ice on her breath.
There might be 😀
I could see that too 😀
EEEK, I can see her – ever so slightly scary! 😀
She’s a sight for sure! 😀
L.T you had me at hi callme
HaHa, what a portrait you’ve painted here, Lana!
Thanks Debbie 😀 Happy writing, my friend!
A wonderful character sketch, Lana. We’ve all seen her, pushing her cart of beer and Velveeta. These lines cracked me up because they’re so true-to-life: “I swear / she was about / to take the skin off / the back of my heels.” Also loved the “Brightbigot radio.” Of course, what else would Meemaw listen to? 🙂
Oh thank you, Joan. Meemaw is quite the character. You’d never guess, but I ran into the meanest old lady in the grocery store the other day…. 😀
What a “colorful” character! She probably doesn’t believe in climate change either. I love your writing, Lana. Your characters are so wonderfully vivid. I hope you’ve escaped the terrible tragedies of the hurricane.
Thank you so much, Diana. Meemaw is a bit colorful, I fear, and I’m pretty sure that she isn’t in the climate change camp. I may have to go back and add her Frump 2020 t-shirt, wink, wink. The hurricane did not impact us, we are at the tip top of Texas by the Oklahoma border. I do have two daughters that live in Houston (stress, stress), but they did not flood and both are back at work. It is such a terrible tragedy for sure.
What a colorful story Lana. Meemaw makes me think of Maxine, lol. 🙂 x
Thanks, Debby, ha ha. She is certainly a go getter! 😀
🙂
Haha! Awesome characterization, Lana! It really feels like we could all watch her running through the store 😄 What a fun piece this is! xoxo
Thanks Sarah! One day, I ran into the meanest old lady at the store. If I knew where she lived, I’d print this and put it on her front door 😀
Haha! Would love to see her face when she sees it! Too bad you didn´t follow her 😉