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MeeMaw in a Hurry

It was right past the

cream of mushroom soup

when MeeMaw blasted by me

with her new hairdo

with a pink stripe in it too!

Beer in her basket, her anger

on soft simmer like beef stew

on a boiler.

She moved swiftly the

promise of a casino’s

winning hand spurring

her schedule

almost knocked me out cold

on the way to

Velveeta and cream cheese

blasting past the fake news

shopping cart turning

on two wheels…

Oh Hon!” like honey pie

I heard her exclaim

then went and grabbed up a

coconut cream

toasted, too

the memory of Dreamsicles

on her lips.

Brisket brunch or

chicken spaghetti?

What to do… to do…for

the Republican Women’s luncheon?

I swear

she was about

to take the skin off

the back of my heels

I dashed by the maraschino

cherries

forgetting those lovely,

seasoned slightly salted spicy

can of Collard greens.

I was

slowing her down

she was

like a lapsed Baptist

on the way to a soul cleansing

or making ’em great rally,

hell hath no fury

like a miffed MeeMaw.

MeeMaw, a tad bit dumpy

much too grumpy

in a hurry here

on Aisle 3

to get home to

her two fluffy dogs

and goal casting

as Brightbigot radio

10th caller of the day.

Published inhumorpoetryPoetry

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  1. A wonderful character sketch, Lana. We’ve all seen her, pushing her cart of beer and Velveeta. These lines cracked me up because they’re so true-to-life: “I swear / she was about / to take the skin off / the back of my heels.” Also loved the “Brightbigot radio.” Of course, what else would Meemaw listen to? 🙂

  2. What a “colorful” character! She probably doesn’t believe in climate change either. I love your writing, Lana. Your characters are so wonderfully vivid. I hope you’ve escaped the terrible tragedies of the hurricane.

    • Thank you so much, Diana. Meemaw is a bit colorful, I fear, and I’m pretty sure that she isn’t in the climate change camp. I may have to go back and add her Frump 2020 t-shirt, wink, wink. The hurricane did not impact us, we are at the tip top of Texas by the Oklahoma border. I do have two daughters that live in Houston (stress, stress), but they did not flood and both are back at work. It is such a terrible tragedy for sure.

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